It was a cold morning in the very beginning of December. The first snow had just fallen, and now it was covering the ground like a white, fuzzy carpet. Everything was so lovely and peaceful outside, but inside the conditions were the total opposite.
I was sitting inside with a nasty cold. I had been battling this cold for quite a while, but it would just not go away.
My mother was nagging at me to go and se the doctor, because my cold could possibly be mononucleosis. . I knew that if I actually did have mononucleosis, it would be terribly bad for me to keep dancing. I would just get sicker and sicker.
From the time I was a little girl I had been dancing. Dancing was my passion, it was what I loved most in the whole entire world. Another thing I loved in life was challenges, and through dancing I could challenge myself. I challenged myself to reach new levels, and I loved it!
One day my mother had had enough, so she dragged me with her to Dr. Richards against my will. I hated doctors’ offices. They were cold and grey, and they always gave me this claustrophobic feeling of being shut up.
While I was sitting in Dr. Richards’ cold, leather chair, waiting for my results, I knew something was not quite right. He looked at me before he gently said “Leukemia”.
For a moment my bewilderment outweighed my panic. Then it hit me. The word “Leukemia” hit me like lightning in a powerful storm. I did not want to believe it. It could not really be true! Could it? Could it?
My eyes ran across the room in circles until they finally landed on my mother. She looked as though someone she loved had just died. “But, but… Is it possible that you might be wrong?” Her voice was shaking and I could tell she just wanted to disappear. Dr. Richards shook his head.
Slowly it became clear to me. I really did have Leukemia. What do I do now? Would I ever be able to dance again?
Then I felt two trembling hands on my small, frightened shoulders. They were my mother’s, I knew that she was going to stick with me and support me the whole way through this. But now I just had to get out of this suffocating room, I just needed to feel free. I had always taken the great gift of life for granted. I never really realized how valuable my life was until now, until I was maybe going to lose it.
Slowly I was bale to get up from the sticky, leather chair, and I walked quietly out of the room without saying a word. I could feel the cold winter air trying to press in from the outside. My mother and I sat ourselves into the car without saying a word, and we both began to cry.
I hated the feeling I had inside of me. The feeling of loss and hurt. How was I going to tell all the people I loved about this? Would they blame me?
Then I suddenly realized it. This was just going to be another challenge along the road. The biggest challenge of them all. But this was not just a physical challenge, it was just as much a mental on.
I knew that I could just not give up. I had to believe in myself and be strong, no matter what happened. Then I made myself a promise. From now on I was going to make the best out of every day, because I could never know when my last day would be.