Task 1A, b)
Janice has used a fairly low and easy level of English. If this would have been an official report I guess her text would be more formal. I want to point out that Janice’s text contains contracted words, for example: can’t and isn’t. Those words confirm her informal way of retelling the interview. However, Janice uses the same words over again which is a typical sign of informality. It is common in formal letters to write in an indirect way, which truly makes it less personal. Instead she could have used synonyms more often. I got the impression, that Janice was not thinking trough her text properly. A formal text is often well structured. Unfortunately I do not see that in Janice’s text.
It seemed almost like if Janice was more focused on Tony’s appearance then on his actual qualifications, even though she refers to his skills in the end.
Task 1A, c)
Dear Tony Blackburn:
Subject: Feedback related to the interview
As you may have noticed, I was surprised by your relaxed way of answering my questions during the interview. I welcome your interest for this job such as your commitment. I also appreciated your personal joy, which was impossible to overlook.
May I still give you constructive feedback related to the interview; I would have been more then happy if you would have come in time. Al though I can understand how complex and confusing our building may seem to you.
If I may make a suggestion, you should dress a little more formal when you are going to a job interview. Otherwise the questioner can easily be distracted by your clothing which would be to your disadvantage.
As long as you answer precisely, honest and in a thorough way, you will give a serious impression. I addition I would suggest that you read about the company and the positions before you apply for a job. Furthermore it would be of great advantage if you could keep your emotions to yourself, unless you get a direct question about that.
Irrelevant statements can weaken your reliability and you can appear as unprofessional.
In order of the company I want to thank you for your application. Unfortunately, we do not think that you suit the position we announced.
Apple Computers Incorporated
Connectors used, http://esl.about.com/od/writingintermediate/a/w_connectors.htm
Inspiration and Information, http://cscs.umich.edu/~crshalizi/Orwell/politics_and_english.html
Writing guide: http://www.bartleby.com/141/
Preparation Text, http://www.theargus.co.uk/jobs/tools/interview_advice/