Hallo mum and dad.
The days I have been here have been good, and you have always cared for me. I know you have always been there for me, and loved me, cared for me. If I got sic, you two would care for me, and I knew that when I got in to your house my days were numbered. In my sleep I could see it. I wanted to tell you, but I never got the chance. I need to find my self, and truly know who I am. This is something I need to do. I beg you not to go locking for me. You won’t find me. I assure you.
Sixteen years I have been here in this house. Sunday mornings you would make me breakfast on the bed, egg and bacon. Out of the window I can look at the water streaming. I can look at it for hours, even before the sun comes up. There hasn’t been a day where I didn’t want to find my old parents, my real parents! You can understand that? When I got my motorbike permit and the motorbike to my sixteen’s birthday, I begun laying the plans. At first I wanted to tell you. But I knew you wouldn’t understand. You never truly understood me, but now I won’t matter any more. I wished you could listen to me, hear me when I talked. But when I tried to tell you both something important, like my parents, you two change the subject. And it drives me crazy. But now you will listen to me! I have gone and I will never come home. I am going home to my real parents. They will listen to me, and we will be a real family.
Dear Elisabeth. You and I have always been the closest. I have talked to you, like I could take to my mother. I loved it in the evening when you would read me fairy tails, and you would kiss me good night. But even so I have to find my real mother and father. I just have to. Imagine if you where born, and you didn’t knew who your parents where? I can’t go every day, and just think of them! No matter, you both got another baby on the way, and you don’t need me anymore. I know you have told me that you couldn’t make a baby, and that’s why you adopted me, but I knew you can!
You don’t need me anymore. I know now that this can never be. This is just a dream; I am looking forward to the end of this.
Dear Frank. I know us to have had our differences, and that we never truly accepted me. But you treated me like second hand. Always placing my needs last. I hope you get happy, now that I am gone. I hope you and Elisabeth can truly start over, and forget all about me. This is what I want, and demand! And you can start being little more thankful.
Thank you for listening for once in my life and making me believe in my self for once, on what I am going to do. You can no longer control me; you don’t have power over me anymore!
- Serina…