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Among the Stars
A girl dies of a heart attack. Her best friend tells the story.
It went so fast. Lilly stood next to me; suddenly she collapsed and was lying on the ground. “Lilly! Wake up, wake up!” I screamed louder and louder. The kids stopped playing and gathered around. Our teacher rushed across the field and kneeled next to me in front of Lilly. I pulled Lilly’s blond curls back from her face. “What’s wrong with her Mrs. Mayer? What’s wrong?” Mrs. Mayer felt the girl’s pulse. Suddenly her expression changed from “In control of the situation” to “Freaking out” “Call the ambulance, NOW!” A couple of kids and another teacher rushed to the school building. I cried and shaked Lilly “What happened? Why wasn’t she waking up?”
Suddenly an ambulance stopped on the pavement near by. The crew rushed out with equipment towards Lilly. They checked her condition very fast, all of them looking grave and grey eyed. Not saying a word. One man told the group to step away. I wouldn’t, I grabbed Lilly’s arm and wouldn’t let go. “No! I won’t leave her, I won’t! She needs me” The men looked at each other, kind of had a silent conversation. Then one of them said “We’ll take her with us in the ambulance.” I exhaled relived. They put Lilly on a stretcher and in minutes we were on our way, driving out of the parking lot. I sat next to Lilly’s bed with some kind of nurse. The group of students and teacher’s only got smaller and smaller. I looked at Lilly, she was pale. The rose colour in her cheek was all gone, her hazel eyes were closed. I wanted them to open! I wanted her to wake up. I already missed their spark.
The ambulance rushed through traffic. The red and blue lights reflected on every car we rushed by. Later they raced Lilly into the emergency part of the hospital. I had to let go of her soft, hot hand as they rushed her inside. The ambulance driver told led me to a little room down the hall. It was small, with only some blue chair and a little table with magazines on top. I sat down and waited. There were a lot of unknown noises and voices hitting me from unknown places. But where could Lilly be? I wanted to see her. Hold her hand again, support her. I sat there for a long time. I just started into the air. Suddenly a figure appeared in the door. It was my mother! “What are you doing here?” She came over and held me tight. The hospital called Lilly’s parents and me. “What’s wrong mum?” I cried again, didn’t bother to dry the tears of, new ones came all the time. “We’ll soon find out, let’s go wait in the cafeteria instead though. I followed her to a table in the little, cozy cafeteria. People all grave and sad looking filled the tables. My mum bought me a coke, I didn’t drink it. Instead I stood up and walked towards the door.
“Hannah! Where are you going?” my mother ran to catch up with me. “I’m going to find Lilly…” I answered in a serious tone. I was serious. “No, darling you can’t. The doctor’s are examining her, to find out what’s wrong. To find out what happened.” “What is wrong mum? Can’t someone tell me?” “They’ll let us know as soon as they find out darling…” I felt tired, like the whole thing was a stupid nightmare and I would wake up again with Lilly standing next to me, laughing. I sat unwillingly down again. “All we can do right now is wait.” My mum sat down next to me. Finally I tok a sip of my coke, the coolness rushed through my dry throat. Fifteen minutes later a nurse stepped into the cafeteria. She searched the room with her eyes; they stopped when she saw me and my mother. She came over and asked my mum if they could talk in private for a minute. My mum gave me a “don’t do anything I’ll be mad at you for” look before she walked away with the nurse. I sat left at the table feeling like a puppy with no home.
The minutes ticked by, I heard low voices in the hall. The little clock hanging on the wall was going so slowly, I felt like beating it up ore something. At last my mum came back. I looked at her trying to read her face. But she seemed to be in trance. She slammed down at her chair and simply looked down at her fresh, red nail polish like she’d never seen anything like it. I shattered the silence. “Mum! What did she say??” My mum seemed to pull herself together before she looked at me. “It’s not could news Emily…” She said silently. The whole aroma of thinking positive seemed to have been erased. “What’s wrong with her?” My mother didn’t look at me anymore, her voice was weak as she said “She has had a heart attack…” “A what?” I screamed. People stared and me, I didn’t care. “How can that be possible? She is only ten years old!” My mother nodded. “I know darling, I know. The doctors are doing all they can to help her right now. But they… they don’t…” “They what?” I yelled again. “They don’t know if she’ll make it.” When I heard her say that sentence I saw my world shatter around me and all the pieces land by my feet. I laid my head on the table. It couldn’t be true, it couldn’t.
My mother went to talk to Lilly’s parents and big sister a while afterwards. I waited in the waiting room instead, soaking one magazine after another. I wanted to see Lilly; I wanted to se her now! Hours past, I fell asleep in my chair, exhausted. When I woke up my mother was sleeping next to me. Fresh tears on her cheeks, I rarely see her cry. I didn’t want to wake her. I slipped out of the room and walked through the white, white hall. Nurses and doctors passed me, they all seemed to me in a hurry. None of them seemed to notice me. I looked at the doors, many numbers. Lilly’s examination must have ended a long time ago… but in witch room and they put her?!” At last I went to information counter or whatever it’s called, told them mine name and asked which room Lilly White was in. The lady asked me to wait, then she tok a phone call. “Yes. I have a girl here. She wants’ to see Lilly White, oh I see. Sure, yes. Bye.” She hung up and looked at me behind a pair of round glasses. Take the elevator to the fifth floor honey, a man will meet you there and help you find the right place.” I thanked her and found the elevator. I moved slowly upwards. I used the time to dry my eyes and fix my messed up hair.
I went out on the fifth floor. A tall man with a white coat, brown curly hair and pale blue eyes stood there waiting. He smiled and said “You must be the girl, Emily. Come with me.” We went through many halls. I felt like the sound of me footsteps would wake up everyone behind the numbered doors trying to sleep. “Where is your mother?” The doctor turned and looked at me. “In the waiting room...” I said. “He nodded, you can only see Lilly for a little while, she is very weak and as you probably know… she doesn’t… she doesn’t have so much time left.” I probably wasn’t used to telling someone as young as me that but I managed not to burst out in tears again. At last we stopped outside a door numbered 536. Lilly’s parents stood holding around each other in the hall. Like they where transferring strength to one another. The barley looked at me as I grabbed the gray door handle and walked inside.
The room was big but pretty empty. There was a huge window, I noticed for the first time that it was dark outside. Then there was a bedside table, a couple of chairs, a bed and Lilly. I rushed over to the bed and sat down in one of the chairs. Lilly’s curls where spread across the pillow. Her eyes where still closed and she was breathing heavily. I took her hand and noticed that it was much cooler than the last time. “Oh Lilly!” I said and cried again. Then I started talking to the little figure in the bed. I told her that I loved being her best friend, that I loved sitting next to her at school, hanging out with her, hearing her laugh, giving her a hug and having our fun sleepovers. I loved whispering secrets, I loved watching the night sky through the window with her and I loved her whole personality. I didn’t know if she could hear me, but I hoped so.
Suddenly her eyes opened. They searched around the room before they met mine. “Emily...” Her voice was thin and shaky. “Oh Lilly!” I cried and bent over her. She whispered “Come closer…” I went closer and then she said. “Next time you watch the night sky, and see the stars… think of me.” “But Lilly! You’ll be okay again. You’ll be okay. We’ll do it again together.” “No Emily, I know I’m going home. Up to the sky, to heaven. I’ll dance among the stars and I’ll watch you from up there. I’ll watch you.” I nodded, I knew she would. Her voice had gotten weaker and weaker. Now she closed her eyes again.
“Someone, come!” I almost couldn’t hear her breath anymore. At once her parents, her sister and a doctor, even my mother came rushing through the door. The doctor felt her pulse and his expression said it all. We all bent over her bed. Then Lilly opened her eyes for the last time and gathered the strength she had left. “I love you…” her hazel eyes twinkled somehow, she wasn’t scared. Then they closed for the last time and second’s later she through her last breath. I was still holding her hand. My eyes were overwhelmed with tears. I gave her one last hug before I whispered “Oh Lilly…” then I was dragged away from the room. Her family needed some time alone with her. I rushed to the window at the end of the hall, and then I looked up at the dark night sky. A few stars had appeared… I watched them shine and then I sobbed “Can you see me Lilly? Can you see me now?”
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